Saturday, February 20, 2010

Goodbye for now, thanks for the memories 3/365

I suppose I could write a great deal on this picture but I'll just post something I wrote that day.

People ask how I'm doing pretty often now. To be honest, I'm not sure heh. I try to avoid thinking about her a lot just because I need to stop thinking that she makes me feel like I'm not alone. I can't say to whom or why I'm writing this; but I think it makes me feel better. I tell myself to stop being so sentimental and that I can't go through the time machine scenarios; but the thoughts linger. Regrets haunt me. I attempt to suppress the bitter taste of too little too late--but fail. The ghost of memories with her never disappear.
Her smooth skin. Her beautiful face. My impressions that she was just well--perfect.
The way she could make me smile whenever she wanted to, I wonder how people let a part of themselves die in the act of falling in love. I try to drown these thoughts in different things and people that I wrongly neglected before. But I suppose it’s working.
I sometimes ask myself who I am changing for. I know I’m not the same person I was since she’s been gone. I tell myself that I don’t try to change because of her, and it was just something I needed to work on for myself but I’d be a liar if I said I stopped caring.

*I'll be ok I promise :)

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